10 Things I Learned in 10 Months of Marriage

Today marks 10 months of marriage for Michael and I!!

We are in the beginning stages of learning how to be a husband and wife, and live as one flesh. I don’t pretend to have everything figured out, and to quite honest, I roll my eyes whenever people share marriage advice when they have little experience under their belts. But I thought it’d be fun to share some things I’m personally learning in the first 10 months of marriage. Everyone’s marriage is obviously unique, but I wanted to give you a peek into some things I’ve been learning.

10 Things I’m Learning in 10 Months of Marriage

1. A strong marriage is made in the small decisions and small moments. It’s continually turning towards one another and choosing one another. And more importantly, continually turning towards the Lord.

2. Make the phrases “I’m sorry”, and “Will you forgive me?” a regular part of your vocabulary, and use them often.

3. Pray together often. One of my favorite parts of our marriage is regularly praying together! It’s so sweet to consistently invite the Lord into our lives and our marriage. Michael recently purchased a book of prayers and liturgies, called Every Moment Holy, and we try to use it several times a week.

4. Remember to have fun together!! While serious conversations are necessary, and there are a lot of things you’ll need to figure out, make enjoyment and friendship with one another a priority.

5. Your spouse can’t and won’t fulfill every need. While I adore Michael with all of my heart, it’s necessary to remember that he’s only human. He was never meant to fulfill me. I need other friends, I need my family, and most importantly, I need the Lord. This is one of those lessons I need to constantly remind myself, because I can quickly find myself hurt when I realize that I was expecting Michael to fill a need that only the Lord can fill.

6. Communication is essential. I’ve learned that it’s so much better to talk something out, even if it ends up being a difficult conversation. That way, difficult feelings can be addressed before they have time to fester.

7. Discuss how you’ll run your house. We’ve found that it’s important to regularly talk about how to divide up keeping our house on track – house cleaning, grocery shopping, scheduling, budgeting, etc. Since we both work full time, we’ve developed a good routine of helping knock out those things together.

8. Be a student of your spouse. Don’t stop getting to know your spouse. I thought I knew a lot about Michael before we got married, but I’m learning that there are always new things to learn and discover about him! And we’re constantly walking through new experiences together, which means we have things to talk about, and ways we can continually grow. It makes marriage exciting!

9. Give each other space. Michael and I are both introverts, and both need regular time to ourselves to think, process, read, and time to ourselves.

10. Get on the same page about money….fast! Statistically money is one of the biggest fights a married couple can have, so it’s vitally important to talk about how you’ll steward and use your money! We’ve used Dave Ramey’s principals to pay off our debt, create a budget, and save!